Treatment Begins and it's Christmas!

Sorry for the long stretch between updates. Between the blessing of the Hawaii trip, the first week of treatment beginning, and trying to get ready for Christmas... you get the idea. I hadn't the time nor motivation to decorate before Hawaii and was beginning to feel overwhelmed at the thought of it. I managed to get the bulk of Christmas cards postmarked Honolulu before relinquishing the rest to the "in time for new years" stack. I packed up and drove myself to the airport. I offered some headache medicine to a fellow traveler, yet another God appointed encourager named Sue, a thyroid cancer survivor. Then, I had those 4 appointments on my way home from the airport. I didn't realize at the time it was to be a very emotional undertaking.

First was my audiology appointment, simple enough, a good baseline to refer back to as chemotherapy progresses. Did I mention I can lose my hearing from the type of Chemo? My next appointment was for the post surgical sinus cleaning which is always painful but necessary. Although this time, she also injected an entire tube of mupirocin ointment (already being used in my saline nasal rinses) and all day long it drained this awful nasty tasting medicine down the back of my throat gagging me. A large orange juice to carry around afterwards is my personal recommendation for the next appointment! The fourth appointment was just a blood draw, however, it was the third appointment of the day which was the hardest by far. I was totally unprepared for this PICC procedure which I thought would be akin to giving blood or getting an IV, but was in actuality a full on surgical procedure. They used an ultrasound to get this infusion line close to my heart. Not only was it more serious and involved, but emotionally it hit me hardest. I found myself sobbing with strangers who understood my emotions better than I did, better than my loved ones do. The technician spoke calmly and lovingly as the assistant wiped my tears with her finger. I didn't dare move. They already lost one site to a failed vein and I wasn't up to a third try. It is hard to cry and not move a muscle, but they held me still and comforted me so that this second attempt was successful. This was the last step before Chemo drugs would be pulsing in my veins. Yes, I have cancer, but the tears dripping down my cheeks confirmed that it scared me more on that day. Yes, I have cancer, but there is treatment, and I thank God for treatment. Yes, I have cancer, but I am so blessed that people across the world are praying for me! 

My views from the radiation table.

So then I arrive home and am completely overwhelmed with trying to get decorations up, gifts finished for the packages still unmailed, and preparations for treatment like grocery shopping, cooking food up, doing laundry, and packing my backpack with books and supplies. The first day of treatment was not without it's issues. Radiation went pretty smooth, they have puzzles in my waiting room which I'd love to work on, but they don't keep me waiting long enough. Then we drive to the Infusion Clinic for Chemo. The PICC line needed to be reset twice. It was painful but necessary, as are many other things in my life these days. Since I don't like to take pills in the first place, it was foreign to me to take anti-nausea meds when I felt fine. BAD DECISION. Christmas with family and friends was wonderful! We laughed, played games, took a few pics, ate great food! I am so thankful the nausea held off till 26th/27th... BUT THOSE DAYS STUNK! I have now been schooled in preventing nausea by taking meds even when you feel fine, therefore this week should be much better! My face is also beginning to be affected by the radiation. Sores are forming on my nose and the skin is tender and reddened. Just before Kyle and Andrea's wedding, I had gotten new glasses to match my pink dress (no big deal, they are the ones you see here); but just before Hope's wedding, I had gotten laser treatment to reduce the redness on the sides of my nose from teen years of squeezing blackheads. That made the photos nicer but as of now, was a huge waste of time and money-oh well. Do you like my forehead waffle print? My green mask was kinda tight today! Not the most flattering photo but this was me at 11am today. Keeping it real.

Waffle marks from my green mask and the red bumps around my nose from radiation.

Till now, my husband has been by my side whenever possible and friends have offered to be with me when he can't. Today, my friend and international missionary, Kristy, and my teen foster daughter are keeping me company. Even when we are all on our electronics, we take time to share a great photo or funny post. It's amazing how blessed one woman can feel just to not be alone at a time like this. Thanks for listening... I'll try to be more lighthearted next time.